Q: Why did the blond quit his restroom attendant job? A: He couldn't figure out how to refill the hand dryer!

Why should you never ask a blonde to make ice cubes for you? She'll never remember the recipe.

When my wife and I showed up at a very popular restaurant, it was crowded. My wife went up to the hostess (who was blonde) and asked, "Will it be long?" The hostess, ignoring her, kept on writing in her book. My wife again asked "How much of a wait?" The blonde looked up, "About ten minutes." A short time later, the blonde got on the loudspeaker, and announced "Willette B. Long, your table is ready."

Last year I replaced all the windows in my house with those expensive double-pane energy efficient kind. But this week I got a call from the contractor complaining that his work had been completed a whole year ago and I had yet to pay for them. Boy oh boy, did we go around! Just because I'm blonde doesn't mean that I am automatically stupid. So, I proceeded to tell him just what his fast-talking sales guy had told me last year... that in one year the windows would pay for themselves. There was silence on the other end of the line so I just hung up and I haven't heard back. Guess I must have won that silly argument!

A man is driving down a country road, when he spots a male farmer standing in the middle of a huge field of grass. Of course the farmer is a blond. :) He pulls the car over to the side of the road and notices that the farmer is just standing there, doing nothing, looking at nothing. The man gets out of the car, walks all the way out to the farmer and asks him, "Er... excuse me mister, but what are you doing?" The farmer replies, "I'm trying to win a Nobel Prize." "How?" asks the man, puzzled. "Well, I heard they give the Nobel Prize to people who are out standing in their field!"

What does a blonde have on her when she is naked? A working uniform.

There once was a blonde who was writing a book. She didn't know what else to write, so she took a block from her little sisters toy box and went to go and watch TV. Her mom comes in and sees the book on the table with the wooden block on it. She goes ask her daughter what it was and her blonde daughter responded, "It's writers block mommy!"

TO: Boss FROM: Blondie RE: Changing Calendars from Y2K I hope that I haven't misunderstood your instructions because, to be honest, none of this Y to K problem made much sense to me. At any rate, I have finished the conversion of all of the months on all of the company calendars for next year. The calendars have returned from the printer and are ready to be distributed with the following new months: Januark Februark Mak Julk I also changed all the days of each week to: Sundak Mondak Tuesdak Wednesdak Thursdak Fridak Saturdak We are now Y to K compliant. Have a nice dak!!!

What did the blonde say when she saw the sign in front of the YMCA? "Look! They have spelt MACY'S wrong!"

Q: Why don't blond chicks date blond guys? A: To avoid inbreeding.