What did the blonde say to the red head? Nothing. She couldn't remember what she was going to say!

A blonde has just inherited a Ranch but only had two horses. The problem was she couldn't tell them apart. So she goes to her neighbor rancher and asks for help. He suggests cutting ones tail a bit shorter then the other. She does it but then a week later she comes back and tells the neighbor rancher that it grew back. So he tells her to tie a different colored string around one of the horses neck. She does it but a week later the tie slips off and she has to go back to the neighbor. So he suggest she paint a different color spot on each of the horses. She does and comes back a week later with cookies. She tells the neighbor rancher, "Here I baked these for you. Your plan worked perfectly. I painted a red spot on the black horse and a blue spot on the white horse."

I was watching Beauty and the Geek the other day, and felt like submitting this joke (as it's somewhat similar to something that happened in the show). A blonde is in school, and her teacher is having a random discussion about IQs. Teacher: "So what would you say your IQ is?" she asks a student Kid #1: "I don't know.. I think it's just the regular 100." Teacher: "He, he, alright, you?" she asks another student. Kid #2: "Umm... well... I took a test and it's 118." Teacher: "Ah, you're pretty smart, then." The teacher then realizes that someone is not paying attention. Teacher: "What IQ do you think you have, young lady?" The blonde jolts up a little due to the surprise. Blonde: "My IQ?" Teacher: "Yes." The blonde then grins arrogantly, "Heh, my IQ is, I would say, probably like an A right now... what is that? Like a 4.0?"

A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night. It was her turn. She rolled the dice and she landed on "Science & Nature." Her question was, "If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can you hear it?" She thought for a time and then asked, "Is it on or off?"

A blonde went to the eye doctor one day. She complained to the doctor that she couldn't see and was having a hard time driving because of this. He then told her that she would need glasses. The blond knowing that the glasses would cost a couple of hundred dollars decided to save her money because she remembered she had some at home. She then told the doctor that she had a pair. He said, "OK, wear them all the time." The blonde left and went home. She called the doctor and told him she couldn't see so he scheduled an appointment and told her to bring her glasses so he could see them. The next day the blond came in holding up two drinking glasses to her eyes and told the doctor "I had a hard time driving over here because my hands were all tied up."

A blonde laughs at a joke 3 times. When the joke is told, When the joke is explained, And 5 days later, when she gets it.

A young man wanted to get his beautiful blonde wife, Susie, a cell phone for their first anniversary. Susie was excited about the phone and the next day, while shopping, it rang and to her surprise, it was her husband. "Hi, Susie," he said. "How do you like your new phone?" Susie replied, "I just love it! It's so small and your voice is clear as a bell, but there's one thing I don't understand ..." "What's that, sweetie?" asked her husband. "How did you know I was at Wal-Mart?"

A blonde lady motorist was about two hours from San Diego when she was flagged down by a man whose truck had broken down. The man walked up to the car and asked, "Are you going to San Diego?" "Sure," answered the blonde, "do you need a lift?" "Not for me. I'll be spending the next three hours fixing my truck. My problem is I've got two chimpanzees in the back which have to be taken to the San Diego Zoo. They're a bit stressed already so I don't want to keep them on the road all day. Could you possibly take them to the zoo for me? I'll give you $100 for your trouble." "I'd be happy to," said the blonde. So the two chimpanzees were ushered into the back seat of the blonde's car and carefully strapped into their seat belts. Off they went. Five hours later, the truck driver was driving through the heart of San Diego when suddenly, to his horror, there was the blonde walking down the street and holding hands with the two chimps, much to the amusement of a big crowd. With a screech of brakes he pulled off the road and ran over to the blonde. "What the heck are you doing here?" he demanded, "I gave you $100 to take these chimpanzees to the zoo." "Yes, I know you did," said the blonde, "but we had money left over - so now we're going to Sea World.....

Two blondes were going to Disneyland when they came to a fork in the road. The sign read: "Disneyland Left." So they went home.

Did you hear about the blonde who took an hour to cook Minute Rice? Did you hear about the blonde who got into the taxi, and the driver kept the "Vacant" sign up? Did you hear about the blonde who was an M.D.--Mentally Deficient? Did you hear about the blonde who thought nitrates was cheaper than day rates?